Everything is new after marriage…coming to a new place from my mummy’s place…toh I did have problems in the beginning. At that time, I also had a problem with my sister-in-law. Yes, even I was at fault then…
Sumeeta Laskar, 45 years, Homemaker, Bangalore
Interviewed by Poorva Dinesh
Why did you decide to speak on family?
I decided to speak on family because I am very fond of my family. I like being with the family and getting the family together and staying together. I put my family before everything else.
Has there been a time when you wouldn’t have been able to face a difficult situation had it not been for your family?
Yes, that’s happened right after I got married. Everything is new after marriage…coming to a new place from my mummy’s place… toh I did have problems in the beginning. At that time, I also had a problem with my sister-in-law. Yes, even I was at fault then…My mummy, papa are not there, but my bhaiya and didi explained to me that there was bound to be a change. Things were not going to be the same at my in-laws’ place. Things would be fine once I adjusted a little. They told me to consider my sister-in-law as one of my didis. So yes, I got a lot of support from my family when I was going through this, because of which I have a happy married life today.
In a few years time your son will start his own family. What advice would you like to give him then based on your personal experiences?
After marriage, a son is always torn between the mother and the wife. That’s the biggest problem he faces. Toh, I will only tell him to give the wife her rightful place and the parents their rightful place. He doesn’t need to keep the mother unhappy to make the wife happy, or make the wife feel unhappy to keep the parents happy (laughs).
I forgot to ask you a basic question. Who’s in your family?
Before marriage or after marriage?
Before marriage, it was mummy, papa, three brothers and we were three sisters. And after marriage, me, my husband, my son, and my sister-in-law’s son.
What does love mean to you?
Pyaar (laughs)…It means what I feel for my husband or my son is indeed love, but to love someone apart from them, to treat them like family or to treat someone like my own son, that is real love. Anybody can feel love for the husband and the child, but to love an outsider dil se as if the person were my own is real love.