Buddhism taught her to stop running away from situations

I have heard running away is not the solution, and the second thing is the more you run away, the more it catches up with you.

Soumya Menon, 28 years, Illustrator, Bangalore

Interviewed by Poorva Dinesh

Why did you decide to speak on hatred?
When I saw your list of topics, this topic sort of caught my eye. I thought it was an interesting subject. We don’t normally dwell upon hatred.

Does that mean you hate someone?
No. I don’t hate anybody.

I do think hatred is a strong word, and well there are people you don’t hate but you don’t feel too good about them either. So let’s go a step down. Is there somebody you don’t like? Somebody you don’t want to meet ever?
Yeah I mean, there is the odd case of – you know – somebody who I’d never want to run into, but I have heard running away is not the solution, and the second thing is the more you run away, the more it catches up with you. Like you said, hatred is a strong word, and its also a strong concept no? I mean the more you hate, the more it destroys you. So it’s self-destructive.

Do you think you can deal with your feelings, and have a pleasant conversation with this person?
Yeah, I have done that as an exercise. Obviously, my gut instinct and my initial reaction was to totally cut off, and dissociate and put on the blinkers, but I have realized that getting over it is so much better for yourself also. These are theoretical concepts that were introduced to me while I was travelling in the Himalayas and I got exposed to a lot of Buddhism. But when it happened, I realized that you are so much better…it’s a very liberating feeling.

Did you tell this person how you felt?
In a way, yes…

Did that help? Was the person’s reaction positive or negative?
Yes. It was positive.
It brings a closure…whether its personal or not personal…that’s it…there’s no more…this whole cycle of hatred – hate is again the wrong word – but it doesn’t exist anymore.

What does love mean to you?
That’s a difficult question. Hmm… I think it means giving your whole to someone and vice versa.

 

Categories: Hatred

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